COMING HOME from Pakistan! :) . . . a total of 495 days, 70+ weeks, 16+ months!
Yes, we are coming home . . . Marina Grace has been granted a 2 year Humanitarian Parole by USCIS! Simply put . . . our MIRACLE!
Due to all the complex legal issues, it has been a while since our last update . . . so, below is an update on the "rest" of our story here in Pakistan . . .
September - We filed an official I-290B Appeal for the I-600 Orphan Status Denial. An applicant has only 30 days from the date of denial to file the appeal, but can ask for an additional 30 days to follow up with an additional legal brief & evidence dossier, which we have done. I have also retained new legal counsel, Poarch Law, an immigration law firm in the Washington, D.C. area. Christine Poarch has taken on our case & we are hopeful that the new legal brief & evidence dossier can be pulled together quickly, since we have only 30 days to complete it (mid Oct). We have also contacted the adoption advocacy organization EACH (Equity for Adopted Children) to help with our plight with USCIS. We are hopeful that McLane Layton (founder of EACH) will be able to advocate Gracy's case personally with USCIS.
October - After a frantic month of working with new immigration/intercountry adoption attorneys, the I-290B Appeal Legal Brief & New Evidence Dossier is complete! It was a whirlwind month of late nights in Paksitan, connecting with attorneys via skype, pulling together all the details necessary for a new evidence dossier. This new Legal Brief/Evidence Dossier is MASSIVE (~ 150 pages long)! No, it is not "light reading!" lol! Christine/McLane have done a very thorough job in pulling the details together. All we can do now is WAIT! It will need to go through a 1st review with the local USCIS office of jurisdiction (New Delhi, India), we are hoping the appeal review will be completed by Christmas/year-end. It would be wonderful if we could be HOME for Christmas, but I'm not holding my breath . . . !
In the meantime, we have also made the decision to go ahead & move forward with an application for Humanitarian Parole for medical care. Hopefully this can be filed within 4-6 weeks. This is very much a "long shot" - the normal process for an HP is to exhaust ALL other options 1st .. . . before filing an application for HP. Since we technically have a "pending" immigrant visa thru our appeal, this is a long shot & I'm told will probably be considered by USCIS to have the motive of "circumventing US law" or entering the US & then MG simply staying! However, if we wait & file the HP after the appeal's decision, it could be 2 years from now . . . Gracy simply doesn't have that kind of time, considering her health issues. So, we are going to go ahead & file the HP application now & then . . . pray, pray, pray that God's hand will lead the way!
It is also time for "another" visa extension for Mama (#6) - application was made for a 6 month visa. it will be 4 weeks before we know if it will be granted. I'm hoping for at least 3 months, which would take me to the end of the year . . . could we be home by then????
November - Still working on the HP application dossier. Medical expert opinions are slow to come in & the holidays are fast approaching. No chance for a year-end return home :(. We are hoping for a mid Dec HP file date - Pray we can get everything pulled together before the Christmas/New Year holidays!
Gracy & Mama did have a very nice Thanksgiving in Islamabad. We had Thanksgiving dinner at the Serena Hotel (only place we could find that served turkey!) . . . Gracy's 1st taste of turkey! She loved it!
Mama is getting very "blue" thinking of the up-coming holidays without my Nicky-boy! I'll miss his 9th birthday along with Christmas with my little guy . . . the tears fall easily when I think about it. :(
December - Surprise, surprise . . . Papa Karim & Shelina made a MIRACLE happen . . . with some strategically placed influence, the Pakistani Ministry of Interior granted me a visa extension with a "1x re-entry" to Pakistan from the US. What this means . . . I can leave & re-enter Pakistan under my current visa . . . aka . . . I can come home for Nicky's birthday & Christmas & New Year's!!! YEAH! I'm thrilled . . . but on the other hand very sad, I will have to leave Gracy here in Pakistan. She will be under the care of a live-in nanny that Papa Karim & I have searched high-n-low for. It has been a very quick process to find someone, but I also know that Papa Karim will have a watchful eye on our Gracy Girl!!! We will skype everyday . . . from the flip side (can my life get any more complicated???)
I didn't tell Nicky or my family I was coming home for Christmas . . . didn't want to get hopes up should it not work out, but it did! I surprised my sister in Austin. Yep, just showed up at her door step on 12/7/11! She was speechless & I almost had to pick her up off the floor! It was GREAT!!! I spent a day with sis & then flew into Tulsa to surprise Nicky!!! When Dalend opened the door . . . just a speechless stare for several seconds, then Nicky popped his head around & I heard "Mama, you're home!" Yes, tears! I just want to say "Thank You" to Laura (Austin) & Jan (Tulsa) for meeting me at the airport & more importantly, keeping my special Christmas "secret"!
The 5 weeks home were a whirlwind . . . so much to do, so little time! Loving on my Nicky, Piano recital, Christmas programs, birthday, Christmas, basketball, baseball, football, friends to "catch up" with, places to go & people to see (3 different legislative offices to share Gracy's story & try to gain momentum fpr the HP).
We were able to complete the HP dossier & submit the application by mid Dec, right before Christmas . . . Now, the wait . . . !
The days fly by & before I know it, it's time to travel back to Pakistan on my miraculous visa re-entry!
January 2012 - Back in Pakistan & loving on my Gracy Girl! She is now sporting a very interesting "bangs" haircut! Somehow that happened while Mama was gone . . . hair grows! :) Skype worked very well, everyday & Gracy was running to Mama with open arms! I'm missing my boy, though . . . but maybe the HP has a chance, maybe soon we will be making plans to fly home to the US, maybe soon . . . ?
mid Jan - our HP application has been rejected & kicked back due to an "administrative" error. The I-131 form has been revised & corrected, resubmitted late Jan.
It is cooolllddd in Islamabad. The only heat we have is from a small floor heater & it just isn't very safe around a 2 year old . . . so I decided to not use it. Mama has brought back a whopper of a cold from the US. It has spread like wild fire through the g.house. Gracy, Papa & staff . . . Uggghhh! we are all cranky!
We are living through the "wait" on both the Appeal & HP. After 90 days from our Appeal legal brief + evidence filing (it has actually been 120 days since the I-290B appeal filing, but what's another month after this long?), we have not heard a "peep" from New Delhi on the Appeal review. We are beginning to seriously question the "why" of New Delhi USCIS . . . yes serious issues with that USCIS office! Hopefully . . . soon!
February - HP application has been rejected AGAIN & we now have to submit new financials (I-134). Please pray - this could be problematic since I am currently unemployed. Through the I-131 supplemental financial application that needs to accompany the I-131 HP application, I have to show adequate financial sponsorship . . . I know there is a way through this, God does have a plan! As of mid Feb, we finally do have an HP application that "sticks" & moves forward to adjudication . . . deep breath & prayers!
Valentine's day is spent with balloons & sweet Gracy loving on her new "pink be-be" (pink teddy bear Mama, Uppa D & Nicky gave her). She loved the bear, valentine cake & candies Papa gave her/us. The adults had a wonderful time & "evening out" at a new restaurant, Des-Per-Des (Live band sang the "Titanic" theme song for me, only song they knew in English, lol!). I watched Nicky & Uppa D open their "Valentines" from Mama via skype.
It is COLD!, but we are making the best of it . . . without heat! Warm blankets & layers! We took a day trip to Murree (Himalayan mountains), a quaint mountain village so Gracy could see the SNOW (her 1st snow!). She loved it, but only wanted to "eat" it! We had a great time, except . . . found out the hard way . . . Gracy gets motion/car sick! A side-of-the-highway "clean up" of little Gracy was required not only once, but twice!
Nicky/Uppa D are in the throws of school, cub scouts & ALL the sports - basketball, pre-season baseball & soccer will start soon! I watch Nicky's games via skype, usually very early in the morning Pakistan time (evening US time).
The "girls" are in Pakistan, the "boys" are in the US - I cannot thank Uppa D enough for ALL that he is doing to keep us "normalized". Without his committed efforts, I simply could not stay here with Gracy. Without Mama . . . Gracy would have to be placed back in orphanage/institutional care until we "can find a way". Leaving her with orphanage caregivers just isn't the "right, best" option. Thank you, Uppa D!
Time for a new PakIstani visa extension for Mama (# 7). When Shelina/Mama make application in person with MOI, I'm told this is my last visa extension . . . based on a new Pakistani visa policy . . . I'm a bit nervous & begin to make tentative plans for a new country "move" with Gracy. I can take Gracy to any other country . . . just not the US! Just which one should we move to . . . is the question?
March - Finally, S.Inhofe's office makes the "call" to New Delhi about our Appeal, it has now been 6 months . . . plenty of time for review. Interestingly enough, immediately after the senator's office makes this call, we receive a denial for the appeal from the New Delhi office. Yes, the very next day . . . question - did ND even review at all? Or, just "stamp" the easy "denial" to satisfy legislative inquiry? We will never know! Anyway, the Appeal has now moved on to the 5th & final review, the AAO (Administrative Appeal's Office) in W,D.C. This is the dreaded 12+ month wait we were hoping we could avoid, but alas . . . I am very blue. My spirit is waning . . . my strength ebbing . . . I just don't understand the "why"?, but I just have to trust. According to 6 competent, immigration attorneys, MG's case facts absolutely comply with immigration law & intercountry orphan status guidelines; she is definitely an "orphan" & should be granted USCIS "orphan status" classification. BUT, our USCIS officials can't seem to put the "facts" together in the accurate, logical timeline sequence & therefore, she has been denied orphan status classification for an immigrant visa for the 4th time! I know God is bigger than ALL of this!
However, a "Yeah!" on the HP side. We have notice on the HP! I can't believe the quick response time on this! USCIS has responded with a request of 8 additional supplemental items/documents. Some of these are "easy" & some are more "difficult". We are "digging in" & diligently trying to complete these as quickly as we can. We do see this as a "good sign", USCIS is reviewing our application &, Oh, do I dare dream & say it out loud? . . . could USCIS be "considering" our HP case? We can't get this supplemental "to do" list completed fast enough, but it has to be thorough . . . the HP decision relies on these supplemental documents . . . special needs Home Study Addendum, Medical Treatment Plan, Immigration Plan & more, etc., etc . . . The next 3-4 weeks are a whirlwind getting everything pulled together. Mama taking additional online classes for an updated Home Study, connecting with Tulsa pediatricians for treatment plans, gathering more documents . . . But, inside I'm starting to believe the HP just might be the possible route home . . . :)
April - 4/12/12 the HP supplemental dossier is rec'd by USCIS! I found out the HP review needs to go through 2 different units, the adoption unit & then humanitarian unit. If the adoption unit gives a favorable recommendation, the HP will move on to the humanitarian unit. Maybe a decision within a 2-4 week time frame (could it really be that quick? I'm not getting my hopes up! lol!). Hoping for the best . . . Preparing for the worst! In the meantime, we need to understand if there is anything else we can do during the 12-24 month "wait" for the AAO appeal decision. So, I "dig in", once again, scouring the internet, searching for any kind of case similar to ours that has had a favorable outcome. And, I have found a precedent setting case in India where a US petition for adoption was granted via a teleconferenced US court hearing. This could be our answer . . . we could possibly come through an I-130 "immediate relative" immigrant visa provision instead of the I-600/IR-4 adoption immigrant visa provision. However, since Pakistan does not have a provision for "adoption", we cannot get an in-country, Pakistani adoption decree, but maybe we can get a US adoption decree through an adoption hearing via teleconference? With an adoption decree, I can prove parent/child relationship . . . the I-130 immediate relative immigration provision just might be a possibility. Mama is making contact with the adoptive family in hopes the adoption attorney for the India case will visit & give advice for MG's case. Fingers crossed that this might become a viable option!
We celebrated Marina Grace's "Gotcha Day" on 4/15/12. I actually took physical custody of MG back in January 2011, so the 1 year anniversary was during the time when everyone had such terrible colds! But, we do have several "dates" to choose from for this special day . . . so I have chosen 4/15, the date we received the Certificate of Guardianship & the Pakistani side was finally completed. We had a small gathering here at the guest house & Gracy was all "pretty in pink"! A lovely pink dress that had lots of lace & tulle. She twirled & twirled in her pretty party ddress, until she couldn't twirl anymore!!! We skyped Uppa D/Nicky in so they could enjoy the festivities, too! It was a great day! I simply cannot believe it has been a year . . . but then I look at Gracy & see how much she has grown . . . yes, it has been an amazing year with my beautiful daughter!!!
On 4/19/12 we rec'd an amazing phone call - The USCIS Adoption Unit has recommended a favorable decision & approval for the HP!!! It will now move on to the USCIS Humanitarian Unit . . . I'm on pins-n-needles thinking that THIS may be IT! Maybe, just maybe, the momentum has turned in our favor . . . maybe all the advocacy phone calls from EACH, Both Ends Burning & legislative offices has finally made a "dent" . . . maybe USCIS is finally "hearing" our plea for Gracy's case! It came so very fast & I'm told the humanitarian unit will make a decision within the next 5-10 days . . . so hopefully we will know in a week!
4/26/12 - The USCIS Humanitarian Unit has also approved the HP . . . I am stunned, please pick me up off the floor, yet so very, very thankful!!! We are FINALLY going HOME!!!!
May - What an incredible month! My sister, Mary Jane & nephew, Joel, had planned a visit in May to Pakistan . . . now they will be here for the final days of our stay, as well. My sister MJ was able to go with me to the USE on 5/7/12 to pick up the HP travel document. It was an experience . . . Gracy is the 1st Humanitarian Parole from Pakistan to the US . . . the USE/Islmbd didn't quite know what to do or how to process an HP. After several phone calls & a 4 hour wait at the USE, we finally walked out of the USE for the last time with a travel document for Gracy to enter the US. The USE security guards were, once again, so kind & sweet . . . they all rejoiced with us, as we walked through for the last time! YEAH!!!! :)
I was able to relive the adoption experience with MJ as I "walked" thru it all again with her . . . I took her to the lower courts & then high court, she met my Pakistani barristers, visited Edhi Home & Dr. Rubina. I also took her to the Ministry of Interior where I pleaded 8 times for a Pakistani visa extension! It was wonderful to share these experiences with her . . . my journey became very "real" to her & I saw the understanding in her eyes with each "stop" along the journey's path. I feel so privileged to be able to share all of this with her!
Joel arrived a week after MJ & we are all now experiencing the sights & sounds of Pakistan. A wonderful day trip to the mountains of Murree, Pakistan (Himalayan mountains). Joel loved seeing the beauty of northern Pakistan. He was shocked (as are most people) at the natural beauty that Pakistan has. No, it is not just "desert"! LOL!
I still have to "pack up" our life here in Pakistan, a somewhat bittersweet task! As I go through our small, little #25 guest house room, I separate "pack", "ship" & "donate" items. Each has such a special memory & I tuck the memories away. I smile, cry & laugh . . . as I relive & remember our "life" here in Pakistan. Wonderful memories to share with Gracy one day! Despite everything . . . I have come to love this country . . . learned to love my daughter's birth place & I can truly say . . . I now understand the culture & country of Pakistan (NO, it is not the awful country everyone thinks it is!). We are leaving Pakistan, but this is not "good by". I have spent "pockets of time" saying farewell to all my dear Pakistani friends.
The hardest farewell of all - leaving New Cape Grace Guest House & the Meghji family - Papa Karim, Sameer & Shelina - Tears fall easily when I think of how much we will miss them. How much a part of our extended family they have become, more than just friends! I watch Gracy with everyone (Papa, Sameer/Shelina & staff), as they teach her "Gracy going to 'merica" & I again tuck special memories in my heart to share with her one day . . . about a special guest house & family, where cultural barriers simply don't exist & global borders are transparent. They lovingly allowed us in their hearts & loved a baby girl . . . just because! The guest house was our "calm, safe harbor" in the midst of the "storm". There are no words to describe my bittersweet feelings about leaving this wonderful, peaceful place that "saved" us!
I will miss all my special friends that I have made here . . . I have very mixed emotions when I think of leaving Pakistan. But . . . we are just leaving, we are not saying "good bye". The friendships & relationships will last a life time. And, in our case . . . the "end does justify the means". Our time spent in Pakistan was well worth our efforts . . . the efforts of doing good are always rewarded!
And, then I look at my sweet Nicholas . . . now 9.5 years old. I have "missed" being with him for 16+ months, almost 1.5 years! I know I'll never be able to get that time back, my heart aches & I grieve over the loss of those days with him, but I do know Marina Grace has needed me here, in Pakistan.
And, yes, I "think" about how my own US gov't has handled or "mishandled" this case in comparison to how Pakistan has handled this case . . . I was placed in such a difficult position . . . no parent should have to "choose" between their children due to "bureaucratic", mismanagement!!! I am just so jaded by our supposed superior US systems that are just so very, very "broken"! But . . . that is a discussion for another day . . . it is now time for rejoicing . . . !
I anxiously look forward to having BOTH my children in my arms . . . at last!!!
So, we are finally Coming Home! :) We leave Pakistan early morning, 5/20/12 & will fly back with my sister (MJ) & nephew (Joel) - Amazing how that "worked" out!
Itinerary
1st leg (5/20) - 3.5 hour flight from Islamabad to Dubai
2nd leg (5/20) - 16.5 hour flight from Dubai to Houston, TX
3rd leg (5/20) - 3 hour care drive from Houston to Austin, TX (spend the night)
4th leg (5/21) - 1 hour flight from Austin to Dallas
5th leg (5/21) - 1 hour flight from Dallas to Tulsa Arrival - Southwest Airlines - Mon, May 21, 2012 05:20 PM
I have had many ask me about "meeting/greeting" us at the airport . . . I say, "Alert the Media! Let's CELEBRATE!"! Everyone who would like to meet & greet us at the airport, "Ajah" ("come on" in Urdu)!!! :)
So . . . We will see you all very SOON!!!
So . . . We will see you all very SOON!!!
As I take a final blog moment to reflect . . . The question is "Would I do it again?" - there is NO hesitation, absolutely, without a single doubt . . . for these 2 children . . . I would do it all again! I stand in awe of the miraculous stories of my precious children! As I have always said, I am simply their "stepping stone" . . . . from their institutionalized life "here", to their future potential "there" with love & Mama . . . the future is unknown, but we look forward to a precious, wonderful life of Love! Both Nicky & Gracy are pure JOY . . . And, the loves of my life! :)
With a humbled, sincere heart . . . Thank You - for all your encouragement & support . . .
Mama, Nicky & Gracy (& Uppa D)
(aka Nancy Baney family)
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